Couldn’t You Have Picked a More Exciting Hobby?

Perhaps you have borrowed too much on your home. You have credit cards, a car loan or two, and even student loans. Most Americans do; it is considered "normal". For the past few years, times have been tough and families have had to cut back. Maybe you have struggled for so long that you have accepted the situation and are no longer looking for a way out. Today, allow me to begin to share that there is a way out, but it will require extreme sacrifice on your part for a period of time.

Over the years, I've read several financial books and articles. I even spent real money on some of those books, actually on quite a few of those books. I could probably stack them up to my waist. I thought one day I’d look back and consider them a wise investment. Most of them covered what needed to be done with money, but lacked in the “how to” department. Some discussed ways to make more money, but didn’t really share the secret of not spending more if you did.

You might say that since leaving college, studying personal finance has been my hobby! Right now, someone is thinking, “Wes, couldn’t you have picked a more exciting hobby?”

Now, let me tell you right up front that I am not a financial planner or a CPA - just a normal guy who had money problems. I think that defines the majority of Americans: Normal people with money problems searching for a solution. I searched for years for a money program that would get me out of the big, deep hole I had dug financially. I was responsible for the hole; therefore I wanted to be responsible for filling it in.

Honestly, there have been a couple of times in my life when I had credit card debt and then I did not. The first time, it was because I took out a consolidation loan. I rolled my credit card debt together with my car loan. Amazingly, after spreading out the pain over five more years, collectively I had a lower payment. The consolidation loan seemed like a great deal, except that it did not teach me a thing about getting and staying out of debt. In fact, it was not long and I had credit card debt again. Also the new loan extended the period I would pay on my car by three years past the original payoff date.

Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others. - Proverbs 12:15

Then a couple years later (2000), I was at a six-month school for the Army. I was not spending much money and was able to quickly pay the credit card debt. I do not remember how much it was, but $5,000 would be a close guess. It was a great feeling to be free of credit card debt. I felt like a chain had been lifted from me. I still had several other chains holding onto me though: the consolidation loan with three more years of payments and quite a bit more in student loans.

Even though I had conquered the credit cards, I was not able to apply the same discipline to the other loans. One reason was that compared to the small amount of credit card debt, the student loans were an enormous amount. The payments were not huge and I could afford them. Paying them was painful though. Each month as the checks were written, I would think of what could be done with the money dedicated to them.

So, I continued to search through books for a plan: the perfect scheme to solve my money problem. Recently I found out that whenever I brought home a new book, my wife’s thought was, “Oh boy, another book on money.”

At some point, I had had enough of programs and “get rich quick” solutions – unconsciously I had stopped searching for a fix. I was ready to accept the “fact” that I would always need a credit card for emergencies. Life was trying to tell me, “You will always have a car loan, home loan, and student loan payment." Personally, acceptance of that kind of mediocrity would have been regretful! I would have been going through the motions: working hard to keep the bills paid, but never really seeing a brighter future through it all.

Have you ever had one of those moments where emotionally you have given up, but mentally your mind says, “God, I’m ready and willing, please help.”

To be continued...

Was this really that long ago? (Addendum)

Addendum: same ROE as before: Red text denotes current thoughts & notes.

As I was preparing Part III of this series, I found a paper copy of the letter.  Part III wasn't in the paper copy, but only on the electronic word document that I had originally found.  This post was at the end of the paper copy, but since it was not germane to the Recovery Mission, I decided to save it for later. Now is later.

Also, I should state that it wasn't long after the "mission" that we received the newer vests with plates...

Architecture and Food - Two of My Favorite Things

At least the trip allowed me to see many residential areas of Baghdad. They build their homes in a much different fashion than ours in the States. As wood is at a premium, they build with block. The lots are smaller than a typical American lot, and are square, or close to it. They do not have large lawns, but use the lot entirely for the building. Usually the back and two sides are built as plain walls, stucco over the block. The front facade is where the exterior design elements are, and where the money is spent. Usually, there is a 6-8 foot wall around the front, with the space behind it carved out to create a courtyard, balconies and various other design elements. The front facades are very unique from home to home. Some facades incorporate marble columns with ornate capitals. Even the window designs are unique and vary in the shapes they create, unlike ours which are ordered directly from the double-hung catalog. With the many variations in design, both in elements used and space created, the homes are distinct and differ in character, despite the fact that most are similar color and materials used.

I am sure it won't be long before there is a McDonald's on every corner here also. After all, there has been a Burger Kind on BIAP for over a month already. If you want a Whopper, sometimes it can be up to a three-hour wait. I have been able to try some of the Iraqi cuisine a few times. Most everything I have had has been pretty good. I even had some Iraqi pizza, which is different than American style.  It was good though.

One of the things I miss about home is the change in weather, if you can believe that. Since we left the States, the only weather we have seen is hot and sunny. No rain, no thunder, no lightning. I think when I return I will probably go outside and jump in a puddle the first time it rains.

Anyway, I should end this. Thanks for your support, thoughts and prayers. At least for me, Iraq is not as bad as it is probably portrayed on the nightly news. I have actually met some very nice Iraqi citizens, and enjoy learning about their culture and views, especially political (now that they have that freedom). They enjoy learning about America also.

Love and prayers, Wesley

When I used to write things like this back to the States, it was mostly in email and shot out to all my contacts. I labeled the subject line, "News from the Engineer Front".  I always signed them "Love and prayers".

A few years ago, I was printing the emails off to PDF files and saving them to my hard-drive. Then I would delete that email. My plan was to eventually print each one to paper and place them in a three-ring binder for my children. At the end of 2006, my hard-drive crashed and I lost a number of them. I did not have them backed up and learned my lesson. For the sake of Part III, I'm glad I found the electronic version of this letter.

Of course, as the years go by, and other events take precedence in my mind, I don't remember as much about what happened day to day "over there". Early on, I had started a journal, but it did not stick. It's so easy when we are going through life to think that we will remember the really significant events later.

What are you experiencing today while thinking, "I'll need to remember this later"?

Was this really that long ago? (Part III of III)

Excerpts from a letter written on 9 Aug 2003 – This is the third part. Red text denotes current thoughts & notes.

Hot & Humid With a Chance of Fire!

The Soldier who was injured during the IED attack, SPC Chasen, received a Purple Heart, and was returned to the United States. From what I heard, he got a piece of shrapnel in the back of his upper thigh - think Forrest Gump!

At the time of the Recovery Mission, we had not been issued the new Interceptor Vests w/ Armor Plating. We went out on the mission with the Vietnam-era vests, no protective plates.

It was very warm that day. We rehearsed our actions on the objective several times, starting at 0700 that morning, and left the LSA around 1300.

It was very hot and humid at the objective. By the time we left, my weapon was so hot in my hands that I just about wanted to hand it off to some of the Iraqis observing us. There were some homes in the area, and of course, all the residents came out to watch our actions.

We were unsure if during the first mission, someone in the area had tipped off the enemy on Alpha Company’s presence, which then led to the original attack. So, there was a thought that our presence could be tipped off again. Therefore, we wanted to spend the smallest amount of time at the objective as possible.

On the way out, which due to the area was the same way we came in, there were a couple of men standing along the side of the road. They were burning some dry grass or leaves, and for some reason, the fire was spread in a line half way across the road (a very narrow road). As we went out, the vehicles were in the opposite order of march, so I was near the tail. The lead vehicle radioed back about the situation. As we approached, I switched my M-16 from safe to semi, keeping the weapon pointed down towards their feet, at the ready. My eyes followed them completely as we drove by. I am not sure why they were burning in this manner, but if they had even flinched wrong, we would have been exchanging more than glances.

Nothing happened.

I am actually surprised that the enemy burnt the vehicle, when they could have very easily just stolen it, using it on a farm, or a worse attack. As the Maintenance Platoon Leader, this was about the most exciting thing I have been able to do here, other than leading the main HSC (Headquarters Support Company) convoy from Kuwait to Baghdad. If you want some really good stories, you should get in touch with 1LT Brad Lavite, who was transferred from the 245th (Maintenance Company) into a Transportation Company. He should be headed back to the U.S. in April (2004).

That day, as I rode in the front passenger seat of the HMMWV, I was sitting sideways, facing out. No doors, no plates; just that Vietnam-era vest with a seat belt holding me in. We didn't have up-armored vehicles, and the original doors were no thicker than plastic wrap. They held the heat in, but little out. It's always better to have physical protection in those types of situations, but honestly I preferred having full range of movement from the door opening. Call it naivete, but being in Iraq during that period didn't create blame in me towards anyone else for what was lacking. Instead, it made me more aware that I needed to rely on God for safety and protection.  Many people, including me, prayed Psalms 91 during that time...here are some of my favorite verses:

v2: This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; He is my God, and I trust Him.

v4: He will cover you with His feathers. He will shelter you with His wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.

v11: For He will order His angels to protect you wherever you go.

v14-16: The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love Me. I will protect those who trust in My name. When they call on Me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them My salvation."

I'm humble enough to know, despite those prayers, I still could have lost my life at anytime in Iraq.  I do not pretend to understand why God allowed me to make it home unscathed. He is my God and I trust Him.

On this day, the seventh anniversary of the start of Operation Iraqi Freedom, I would be remiss to not remember those who did give the ultimate sacrifice and in memory of them simply say:

"Thank you"

Click for Addendum

Was this really that long ago? (Part II of III)

Excerpts from a letter written on 9 Aug 2003 – This is the second part.  Red text denotes current thoughts & notes.

High Profile Recovery Mission

This last Tuesday, 5 Aug 2003, I was put in charge of a recovery mission to grab a 2 ½ Ton Truck for our Alpha Company. It was involved in an incident with an improvised explosive device (IED) about two weeks prior to our recovery. The soldiers involved left the vehicle to take a wounded soldier for medical attention. When they returned later, the vehicle had been burnt to a crisp, a complete loss.

It was located in a bad area of town, just outside of the built-up area of Baghdad. The location was about 1000m from the Tigris River, and the vegetation was quite high surrounding the road where it was located. It looked more like a jungle than a desert. We took 13 vehicles out to recover it, including three Military Police vehicles (each commanded by a Captain) to assist with security. The Group Commander, a Colonel, and his Command Sergeant Major also went. The location was 20 miles away from BIAP, but with traffic it took us one-hour travel time each way.

After checking for booby traps, we lifted the vehicle onto a lowboy trailer with a crane truck. The recovery operation took 30 minutes. We closed the narrow road while we accomplished the operation. The operation was a complete success without any serious incident or enemy contact. Thank God for that. Despite the success of that recovery, I do not want to see another area similar to that one the remainder of the time I am here.

Looking back, this mission is a classic military case study on the fallacy of micro-management. Based on the excessive command attention I got, you would think it was the mission meant to end Operation Iraqi Freedom. Maybe it was in some "war hero's mind"! At the time, I was a Platoon Leader (First Lieutenant) in the United States Army. The nation was entrusting me to fulfill the responsibility of that role. I appreciated having the Military Police there to help with security and firepower, and the three Captains knew their role was support. They did not try to take over my mission. But, did I really need a Colonel and his Sergeant Major to successfully complete this mission?  Why did they feel the need to force themselves onto the scene and control every minor detail? Would I have done everything in the exact manner as them?

If they wanted to lead this mission, then why did they need me to tag along? When leadership does not allow their subordinates to step up and take charge, then the subordinates will learn not to step up and take charge. Novel concept!

Leaders, if you do not allow your subordinates to fail, how will they ever learn to succeed? ...Besides, it's a Senior Non-Commissioned Officer's job to make sure his Lieutenant doesn't fail!

Click for Part III

Was this really that long ago? (Part I of III)

Excerpts from a letter written on 9 Aug 2003 – I plan on posting this in three parts. As I read through the original, it seemed to break up nicely that way. Lately, I've been finding things I wrote a few years ago. Thought they might be worth sharing...

Greetings from BIAP, IRAQ

For those who are unaware, BIAP is the Baghdad International Airport, formerly known as Saddam International Airport. No, he isn't a narcissist! Anyway, now we pronounce it “Bi-Op”. I have been here for a little over two months now, after spending a little more than three weeks in Kuwait.

Sometimes it seems surreal that I am really in Iraq, a country that the U.S. has been aware of for over 20 years now, but few Americans have visited. Currently we are going through the hottest time of the year, with temperatures ranging up to 135 degrees. It feels sort of like sticking your head in a brick oven. They say it will start to cool off at the end of August. Maybe we will see it drop to below 120.

In 2 months time, we have seen some things improve quite a bit and other things not so much. We continue to live in our tents, obviously, but at least we have wood floors built in each tent. We have A/C units for the tents, but continue to wait for the power grid to come up in order to actually see them work. Yesterday we were served our first meal out of a hard stand dining facility, instead of the normal Mobile Kitchen Trailer (MKT). The Dining Facility is run under a contract, so there are civilians working it, not the battalion’s cooks. Currently we only get dinner there, so we are still eating Meals Ready to Eat (MRE) for breakfast and lunch. But within a week’s time, they will serve 4 meals a day at the contracted dining facility, including a midnight meal (Soldiers are working 24/7!). The dining facility is nice, with lots of A/C and potable ice. First time we have had that in over 3 months.

As far as missions, the battalion continues to improve the military side of BIAP. Preparing the ground for the master plan and many buildings to come. I have the feeling that there will be an U.S. military presence here for a long time. Eventually, it will be just like Korea, with active duty soldiers serving 1-year hardship tours continuously. We don’t know anything about an exact date of when we will be allowed to return home. Rumors swarm every couple of weeks or so. We have orders that go to next May, but they could be shortened, and they could be extended. Some think they won’t let us go beyond six months, as that is when VA benefits kick in. But, six months is not too far off, and we have not heard anything yet.

On BIAP, we enjoy a relative amount of safety and security. Sure, something could still happen, and you must keep your guard up, but at least we are not out in the middle of the desert or a jungle. I only get to leave BIAP on occasion, and when I do, it is with quite an arsenal of weapons and ammo.

Honestly, with all that's happened since I wrote this, it feels like it was a whole other lifetime ago. I'll post Part II in a few days...

What Are You Going To Do About It?

Recently, I had lunch with a colleague, and we discussed many things. At one point, we were discussing the Connect Group which Mindy (my wife) and I lead through our church. It’s a book study group based on Dave Ramsey’s book, The Total Money Makeover (TMMO). We’ve led the group through two semesters, and are just about to start our third. Ever since I can remember, I’ve had a passion for personal finance. I’ve read all kinds of books on it, and tried all sorts of systems. But it wasn’t until TMMO that I found something that really works.

My friend told me what we are doing is important, and he put it this way: “The three big rocks in a marriage are Intimacy, Communication, and Finances.” I’d never really thought about marriage with such uncomplicated clarity before. Both he and I are Christians, so involving God in your marriage was a given. The more I think about what he told me, the more it makes sense. If a man and a wife get those three things synchronized, then any other issues should tend to fall in place.

Now, I’m not about to give anyone advice on Intimacy, but I do know it’s important. Anyone who watches the news reported on society today would know it was important as well. And, I’m the last person you should talk to about better communications with your spouse – I’m too task-oriented. But, you start talking about Personal Finance and you’ve got my attention.

It’s no secret that our economy has struggled for the last two years. In turn, this has caused many families to struggle as well. But, my question would be this:

“What are You going to do about it? Are You taking a good, hard look in the mirror?”

See each of those big three rocks mentioned above are very personal things. No one is asking the government to assist their marriage with bailouts of Intimacy or Communication. Why then would we ask the government to assist with our Personal Finances? Maybe as a Nation, we just don’t know where to start. Here is a starting point, two items: Contentment & A Developed Plan.

Contentment: We are a living in a Society of Debtors, because we are not content. The wealthiest nation on the planet, and yet we are servants to lenders! Being a debt society is one of the culprits of our current economic crisis. We have replaced our needs with our desires. We place our desires before our needs. We need healthcare, but how many are willing to place that expense as a priority above entertainment? It is great to have desires, but we must live within our means and not “reward” ourselves until we can afford it. Contentment requires discipline. Discipline requires Focus.

A Developed Plan: A well-written plan requires focus to develop. It must be laid out in an achievable manner and help you reach your goals. A plan isn’t just something you write and throw on the shelf though either. A plan is a course of action, which means that it must cause you to do something. In this case, we want it to be positive action. A study of Harvard graduates found that after two years, the 3 percent who had written goals achieved more financially than the other 97 percent combined! That is an incredible stat which should motivate you to write down anything you hope to achieve.

This may not directly help with Intimacy or Communication in marriage, perhaps only in an indirect manner. Start working on the betterment of your Personal Finances, and partner with your spouse in this area. Doing this will open up lines of communication, and get you agreeing on the money allocation plan (budget) together. When you start communicating on one thing, other topics are sure to follow. The more you are communicating with one another, the more intimacy you will start to enjoy. I’ve heard it said that money fights are the number one cause of divorce in America. So, stop fighting about money, and start focusing on being content and building a plan. It may just transform your marriage!

Do I Choose Bovine Silliness or Wise Humbleness?

This blog is young, and it is already taking turns I was not expecting. Today’s post will be one of those turns. Part of my nightly routine is that I always tuck my son into bed. Our routine is reading a story or a chapter if the book is longer. Then it is lights out, which is the official signal to start wrestling. More than just wrestling, this is wrestling mixed with tickling and laughter. When the wrestling is done, we settle down by ending our day with prayer. This is always a great silly and serious time of bonding between a father and son. It is an important part of each day for both of us.

Most of the books we read come from the children’s section of our local library. He goes through phases of different well known characters: Berenstain Bears, Curious George, and the Peanuts Gang. Lately he has been into a series of books based on two cows, named Minnie and Moo, who sit under a tree. Moo reads, thinks, and has a runaway imagination. Minnie drinks espresso and worries about what idea Moo will have next.

To a kindergartener, the first couple of books we read were funny. Over all, they were pretty innocuous. Written for younger children, who would still be learning to read, the parent would most likely be reading it to them. An alert adult would still be involved in the details to which the child was being exposed. One episode, Minnie and Moo attempted to save the farm by going to the bank and just asking for money. The only problem is they went dressed in trench coats, one carrying a violin case, and handed the cashier a note with a request for the money. You can imagine how that turned out. In the next book, they dressed up as two chickens to sneak into the hen house. They were looking for a jelly donut thief, who they had rationalized could be a blue chicken. When a wolf shows up, the rooster attempts to convince him that he should go for the two bigger chickens as they would make a better meal.

About a week ago, we started reading a longer Minnie and Moo story: Minnie & Moo and the Seven Wonders of the World by Denys Cazet. It states on the inside of the cover: Ages 7-10. So, it was written for children who would be reading it on their own. The Summary states:

Two cows try to save their farm by creating seven wonders and asking the other animals for donations to see them, but there is a wondrous and frightening creature in the woods that could foil the plan.

Seemed harmless enough, right? As this was a longer book, we were only reading one chapter a night. We made it through the first three chapters without as much as a hint of trouble. Then it happened, Dad’s internal alarm started going off. Why does the picture at the front of tonight’s chapter show one cow wearing “a turban with a red plastic jewel in the center of her head?” In front of the cow, setting on a table, she was holding a bowling ball with both hands. There were many other farm animals standing around her, looking on in curiosity. Taped to the front of the table were two signs, “Save Our Farm” and “Presidential Bunion” (a free lead-in to the Seven Wonders). On the table was one more sign, but the writing on it was not legible. We started reading, and on the next page finally discovered the content of the illegible sign, which also provided clarity about the jeweled turban and bowling ball. It read:

Madame Minnie

Mistress of the Presidential Bunion

Teller of Fortunes

When I saw that, I stopped reading out loud and started scanning ahead. My son of course was wondering why I had stopped, and wanted to know what I was doing. As I scanned ahead, I read other phrases that were bringing me to full alert.

“The mystery of the bunion. What magic lies within? What other presidential faces might appear to those with the vision to see Mother Nature’s magic?”

“I saw Mother Nature’s magic.”

“Madame Minnie will gaze into her crystal ball and tell you what you will see!”

That was all I needed to see; I closed the book. Is it really acceptable to the world to expose 7-10 year old children to the occult? Apparently, it is; as it states “A Junior Library Guild Selection” inside the front cover. Inside the back cover, it states: “Denys Cazet first introduced his lovable cows in a series of books for beginning readers. Here is more bovine silliness for children reading on their own.” I guess it is acceptable to the world, depending on whether the word “bovine” above is interpreted as a noun or an adjective. If it is a noun, then we are just talking about two silly cows. But defined as an adjective, it is bovine silliness to introduce children to the occult “on their own”. Used as an adjective, bovine can be defined as: crass, coarse, insensitive, Philistine, rude, and vulgar.

I informed my son that we would not be able to finish the book. He, of course, was curious as to why not. I went into our bedroom to let my wife know why we couldn’t finish the book. She agreed with me that it was inappropriate and not acceptable material for our young son.

Perhaps you are reading this and wondering, “What’s the big deal?” Allow me to explain. We are to judge things according to a standard. That standard must be higher than us. The Bible, God’s Word was intended to be that standard for all of mankind. God’s Word is pretty clear on the topic of fortune-telling and witchcraft. He spelled it out to the Hebrew people when they were preparing to enter the Promised Land:

“When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you, be very careful not to imitate the detestable customs of the nations living there. For example, never sacrifice your son or daughter as a burnt offering. And do not let your people practice fortune-telling, or use sorcery, or interpret omens, or engage in witchcraft, or cast spells, or function as mediums or psychics, or call forth the spirits of the dead. Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord. It is because the other nations have done these detestable things that the Lord your God will drive them out ahead of you. But you must be blameless before the Lord your God. The nations you are about to displace consult sorcerers and fortune-tellers, but the Lord your God forbids you to do such things.” – Deuteronomy 18:9-14

And despite this clear warning, later we see the consequences when the Israelites rejected God’s Law:

“They even sacrificed their own sons and daughters in the fire. They consulted fortune-tellers and practiced sorcery and sold themselves to evil, arousing the Lord’s anger. Because the Lord was very angry with Israel, he swept them away from his presence. Only the tribe of Judah remained in the land. But even the people of Judah refused to obey the commands of the Lord their God, for they followed the evil practices that Israel had introduced.” – 2 Kings 17:17-19

Just in case you are thinking, “Those are Old Testament references, they no longer apply to today’s teaching,” allow me to put a finer point on it. The New Testament clearly defines the foundation from which the sin of fortune-telling is established:

“One day as we were going down to the place of prayer, we met a demon-possessed slave girl. She was a fortune-teller who earned a lot of money for her masters.” – Acts 16:16

You might still say, “What is the problem? It’s just a story. It doesn’t mean your child will turn to that.” I would answer, “Why introduce my child to the sin of fortune-telling which is built on the foundation of demon-possession?” In doing that, I would be assisting the devil in digging a hole in my child’s heart for that foundation of sin to be established. If I read it to him and pretend it is no big deal, then I have in effect told my child that it is acceptable. He has no reason to question it; he trusts his father. He doesn’t yet understand that God finds it detestable. If I abide in God and God finds it unacceptable, then I must find it unacceptable. It is no small coincidence that a few days later I noticed a young teenager at McDonald’s with what appeared to be a pentagram hanging on a chain around their neck. Both decisive action and indecisive non-action have consequences.

God’s Word says He will make fools of fortune-tellers, who predict only lies. I do not want to be associated with fools and liars, nor do I want my son to be associated with them. As a loving father, why would I hesitate in putting up a tenacious fight to protect my son from demon-possession? The best way to protect him is to ensure he isn’t exposed to that path at such a young age, before he understands the consequences. As a father, I have a mission to properly warn my children of the dangers along the path of sin. If I failed to act now and he were to take that path, then I also run the risk of contributing grief to his mother, my wife:

“The proverbs of Solomon: A wise child brings joy to a father; a foolish child brings grief to a mother.” – Proverbs 10:1

I want to experience joy. I want my wife to experience joy. I want my children to experience joy. To further that experience, I will choose to remain constantly vigilant, bold in my convictions, and not concede ground on my watch. According to the world, perhaps I am just being silly or arrogant; according to God I am being wise and humble.

Given the importance of raising children, what will you choose to do? How tenacious will you fight for an outcome which provides God's joy as the consequences for your children's choices?

For more of God’s Wisdom with regards to the fallacy of the occult, read: Leviticus 19:26; Isaiah 3:1-3; Isaiah 44:25; Jeremiah 27:9; Jeremiah 29:8-9; Ezekiel 21:29; Daniel 2:27-28; Micah 3:6-8; Micah 5:11-13; Zechariah 10:2-3